Comcast Part II: Nearing of the Cancelation

So, you remember last month? Here, let me remind you:

Finally, FINALLY, she tells me that all the additional changes/credits, whatever, should appear on my next bill. "As a matter of fact, it should be negative," she says.

I asked her three different times, in three different ways, to confirm that my next bill will be negative (i.e. Comcast should have credited me) and each time she confirmed it.

We'll see. I have more faith in Osama bin Laden converting to Christianity than in Comcast getting something right.
--"Comcast...DE MUERTE", 8/17/07

Well, welcome to Comcast de Muerte, part II. I'll give you a spoiler: it's going to end in cancellation.

I received our bill. It was 28.14. It's missing just one little thing: a negative sign.

No problem! I was smart last month: after finally resolving the issue, I asked the lady if she could write a note in her computer system stating, explicitly, "This guy's bill will be negative." "Sure!" she says. "Done!"

"Great," I say. "Now give me a reference number, so next month, when my bill ISN'T negative, I can call up and say, "Here's a note that says my bill should be negative."

"Here you go," she says, and gives me a number.

This month, my bill isn't negative. Again, no problem. Instead of calling, there's apparently a new "Chat Online About Your Bill!" service. I decided to try it. I log on. "Jeff" comes online to help me. "Hello! What seems to be your problem?" I start writing back, but before I can finish, Jeff leaves, with the chat message, "This issue has been resolved" or something along those lines. What the...?!

I try again. This time I get "Amis." This guy sticks around long enough for me to explain the situation and give him the reference number to the note. "Let me read the note...sorry, there's nothing here about your bill being negative. If you need more help, call Comcast. Goodbye." He vanishes with the same, "This issue has been resolved" note before I can even respond. Wow. Remember that picture I posted about Comcast's customer service being as smart as a brick? That was extreme flattery.

I go back to the phone and get Chuck. Chuck is nice, but confirms that there's no note about my bill being negative. "I *can* give you $10 credit for the 11 days you were without service," he offers. Thanks, but that's not really what I was promised or expecting. And 11 days? Where'd THAT number come from?

"Alright, Chuck," I say. "Give me the $10 credit." And what I didn't add, because Chuck doesn't care and I don't like taking my frustration out on low-level phone-answerers, "And when your supervisor approves it in the two days or whatever you said, I'm paying my bill and canceling."

So there you go. Comcast is gone. Not because I had to call them so often with problems that they made it to my "Fave 5" callers on my cell phone plan (it's true), and not because the service is spotty (also true), but because I was lied to. It's a "principle of the thing" now. I'll make do without internet at home rather than deal with a company whose employees will out-and-out lie to me.

...oh, and before I forget, when I signed up, I didn't want to give them my Social Security Number. Identity theft reasons and all that. "No problem," they say, "Give us a refundable $70 deposit instead." No problem. I give it to them. Now, what are the odds that I'll get that back? I'm not too confident.